Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Cry Me a River


At one point in my life, I rarely cried. Not that there was a lack of things to cry about. There was an abundance, but I was the stoic sort that keep things neatly bottled up inside. It was safest that way. If they can't see your pain, they can't use it against you.

Then one day, that changed. I generally blame pregnancy and hormones for the shift. I, incorrectly apparently, assumed that once the hormones regulated I would return to normal. But here we are four and a half years post baby and the tears stream freely. I cry over tv commercials, songs on the radio, stories people tell and books that I read.

I have only just dried my eyes as I finished my latest book. The tears forming little rivers as I mourned a fictional character. It bothers me how easily I cry these days. It happens at inopportune times. While explaining myself to my ________ (boss, child, husband, friend), my eyes fill. While driving down the road and certain songs come on the radio. I have soaked the cuffs of my sleeves removing tears in the hopes that no one will notice.

I just wish I wasn't quite so transparent.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, but I love you for it. :-)
-Ducky

-Ann said...

I empathise with you on this one. I cry when I get exceptionally angry, which is so annoying to me, especially when it starts to happen in a work situation.

K kid said...

I had the same experience. I almost never cried until I had children... then something hormonal permanently changed my tear ducts. Especially when I am pregnant, the tears just flow for whatever, whenever.

Jadie said...

Was it The Book Thief?

JSLindgren said...

You have to cry over the Book Thief! The other stuff however. . .